Grand Lux Boutique Manor

The Grand Lux Boutique was an excellent experience. We stayed 3 nights, in a sumptuous room. I was a little concerned about some of the negative reviews, but these seem to be several years out of date - I believe the hotel was refurbished a year or so ago. The staff were very pleasant. The hotel was being run by Janisha, who was unfailingly helpful in recommending restaurants, making bookings, calling taxis for us and suggesting where to go: she really added to the experience. As to the hotel itself, it is difficult to describe it in a few words. It is a mixture of totally up to date modern and antiques and history: take care or you will bump into a bronze statue! It is an eclectic, some might say eccentric, mixture of new and old, a personal interior design project for the owner (who also has a safari lodge): conventionally it should not work, but it does! If you want chic ultra-modern minimalism, this is not for you, but if you like somewhere quirky, friendly and very unusual as well as being top drawer quality, you could do worse than give this a try. As to location, it is on the clifftop path about 20 minutes' easy walk from the town and its wonderful restaurants, or an inexpensive taxi in the evenings. It was not whale season, but during the SA winter months, there could be fantastic views from the hotel itself - they even have a spotting scope set up for guests to use. If we do come back to Hermanus for the whales, this is where we will stay.

Without question the strangest hotel we have ever stayed in. The host Thembi was chief, cook and bottle-washer and went out of her way to accommodate any request, but the place itself is just ODD. On check-in we were asked to sign a liability waiver (it probably even means I can’t write this review but what the hell). I have never experienced anything like this - a place that seeks to absolve itself of all responsibility for absolutely anything during your stay. Whilst signing we were given sherry and a cold wet towel before heading up to our ‘suite’. Up an outdoor narrow steel spiral staircase (the only route to our rooms, apparently), our room had seven (I think) doors to outdoor terraces, only one of which was open. The others were all locked and the terraces out-of-bounds yet bedecked by furniture in the sunniest spot of the hotel. One of the locked terrace doors even led to our bathroom! The decor felt like someone had let off a chintz cannon in the bedroom. Beautiful antique style furniture was littered with swathes of fur and sparkly sequin cushions. It felt like Anna Nicole Smith had exploded over Frank Sinatra. The complimentary bubbles in the room (you couldn’t call it champagne, even though they did) was lovely, the exercise bike next to it unnecessary. The pool is in the yard, in the shade, and to get to it you have to walk through the restaurant and bar, again only accessible from outdoors. The bar felt like it had been built in the 1980’s by my flash car-salesman uncle, and was resplendent with cut glass crystal decanters that once held elixir but now gather dust. It feels like somewhere that used to have huge house parties that one day just ran out of juice, and now what’s left is a bizarre system of guest accommodation that doesn’t really work. A glance down the wine list saw Thembi disappear a number of times to the other side of the hotel only to return with the news that hardly any of it was in stock. When asked if we could book for dinner in the hotel restaurant the response was ‘I’m making chicken Kiev tonight’ - not quite what we had in mind. Breakfast was equally disturbing, with just too much going on - on the table, on the serving table and on the plate. Upon checkout we were passed a slip of paper and asked to fill it out there and then. It was a feedback form. I said that I wouldn’t be doing that and that if I had any feedback I would pass it on at a later date. Thembi looked visibly worried, and tried to press me into completing it, saying ‘you have to fill it out’. We got the impression that it wasn’t going to go down well if she didn’t deliver the form. Thembi did everything anyone asked of her, and always with a smile and warm words, but there was an overall feeling of unease throughout our entire stay - I can’t quite put my finger on it, but the whole place just gave us the willies.

Amazing place. The rooms are really outstanding like I’ve never had anywhere before. Also the rooms are spacious and clean. The boutique is located near the center and the Harbour. Thereby the hosts are really nice. Thank you for the amazing stay :)